After being subjected to my mother's bombardment of negativity about everyone on the planet, I was determined to form my own opinions about people based on my own experiences with them rather than blindly hate and distrust them all and fear their horrible germs. Of course all my open-mindedness did not aid in picking a marriage partner.
Instead it allowed predators of all kinds to get close to me. The one protection I still had was a strong instinctual gut reaction but I did not always listen to it. This is what happened in the case of my second husband.
After the death of my father, I was "in limbo" so-to-speak, and I allowed myself to be sucked into a long-distance relationship. We had met as "friends of friends," and he lived in another state. The alarm bells were going off in my head before I ever moved out there and married him but I dismissed them as jitters because my first marriage was such a disaster and this one was a polar opposite of the lifestyle of my first husband so, of course it MUST be OK. What a joke that turned out to be. Shoulda listened to the bells!